A Year Without Love DVD
This is honestly one of the most bleak, cold, miserable, and ugly films I've ever seen. It is so depressing that it drags you down with it. You start to feel for the pro-antagonist. He's really only his own antagonist.
A young author, home in Argentina from a stint in Paris where he lived with his lover who had succumbed to HIV, finds himself moving from one traumatic situation to another when he finds out that he as well is afflicted with HIV. Living in a shithole apartment with his aunt, he becomes lonelier and lonelier knowing that his life story is slowly coming to a dull climax in a dimly lit room, surrounded by four dank walls. He delves into the world of online dating to no avail. While he's sinking, the disease is growing inside him and becoming a steamroller that will eventually plow through his entire life. He visits doctors to give a new HIV suppressing medication a chance, but becomes weary of the medication and begins to not trust it. His sense of loneliness is growing almost as rapidly as his incurable virus. Going without the medication, he decides that if he can't cure one of his ailments, he'll find a way to cure the other. This leads him to promiscuity with unsuspecting men, eventually joining a group that participates in extreme sadomasochism. None of the men involved in this group want anything to do with romance, compassion, companionship, friendship... nothing more than sadism. He does befriend one of them in an unconventional way. Eventually telling this new friend about his career as a writer, he wants to publish his own diaries as deep and revealing as they are. His constant struggle with loneliness isn't going anywhere though, upon publishing his book, everyone from his "straight" life distances themselves from him.
The tone of the film really reminded me of some Jorg Buttgereit mixed with Mike Leigh content. I can't stress how bleak it is. If you're dreaming of feeling like shit, this is the film for you.